Unattainable
by CallMeClandestine
Summary: Tenten wanted an ending she knew they couldn't have, and Neji only made it harder for her to walk away. But their first kiss marked the end of her hopes. NejiTen.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N:** Why is it that NejiTen always seems to be the best couple for angst? Or maybe that's just my opinion... This is going to be a two-shot, so the story does not end here, but it's almost over. I listened to Silverstein while writing this (wonderful band, check them out). Let's see...can't think of anything else to say.

**Disclaimer:** Naruto's not mine, blahblahblah, and all that jazz.

**Summary: **Tenten wanted an ending she knew they couldn't have, and Neji only made it harder for her to walk away. But their first kiss marked the end of her hopes.

* * *

**Unattainable**

Tenten stood still, one hand resting on the rough tree trunk, the other limp at her side as she stared at the moon's silvery sheen on the pond's surface, eyes sliding out of focus as she let her thoughts still. The slightest breeze caught her bangs and blew them across her face, and the water rippled to the tune of dancing leaves. Tenten closed her eyes and took a steady breath, held it in for a bit too long, and let it out in a gratifying whoosh.

She heard the out of place crackling of twigs and leaves from behind her, but made no outward move to show that she recognized her visitor.

"Tenten, I know you know I'm here."

Her lips tweaked into the smallest of sad smiles, and she opened her eyes to stare at the once-again calm water's surface.

"Hi Neji," she said quietly, a hint of some unsure emotion hidden in her voice.

Her teammate of ten years joined her at the edge of the dark pond, making little noise as he did, and they reverted back into heavy silence. Tenten closed her eyes again so she wouldn't have to see his white shirt out of the corner of her eye, but she still felt the soft fabric brush against her bare arm every time the wind picked up. The air was calming, with a faint piney smell, but she still had trouble calming the turbulence of thoughts and emotions that were threatening to spill out.

"Did you get the invitation?" Neji's low voice cut through the silence, and Tenten felt his eyes on her. She nodded her head slowly, right hand stiffening against the rough bark of the tree.

"Have you replied to it yet?"

Tenten bit the inside of her bottom lip and shook her head, too afraid to open her eyes because she didn't want to see the way Neji's eyebrows would slant in question. She had gotten the invitation, but she hadn't opened it. She hadn't needed to in order to know what was enclosed in the gold-trimmed envelope.

Instead of the "why not?" that Tenten was expecting Neji to say next, she was instead asked, "Do you _have_ a reply to give me?"

The way he asked it wasn't demanding or forceful, it was simply inquiring. No extra emotion given, no extra emotion needed. Strictly businesslike, just like it was supposed to be. Just like _they_ were supposed to be. And Tenten knew that they weren't meant to be anything more than two teammates, and maybe friends, but still, it hurt. But since she was Tenten, she would pretend that everything was fine, and she would give Neji the answer she knew he was expecting.

"I'll come," she said after a long pause, and she opened her eyes to meet Neji's.

She immediately regretted it, since her heart jolted painfully against her chest and her lungs squeezed tightly and her legs suddenly felt almost nonexistent. Unlike many claimed, his eyes were not as bright or as white as the moon; Tenten knew better than that. Neji's eyes were ivory, yes, but they had an insignificant tinge of lavender that many didn't notice, and that's what made them even more beautiful than the moon.

And Tenten gave up, she gave up with her façade and she let the small crack in the wall that was dulling her emotions widen, bigger and bigger until there was a gaping hole left.

She didn't even fight the impending tears pricking at the corners of her eyes; there was no point anymore. It was dark and shadowy, and he _knew_ anyway. He knew her secret (which wasn't a secret anymore), and he could see how much she was hurting, which is probably why he said,

"Are you sure?"

Tenten looked at the ground, and muttered in a small voice, "Unless you don't want me to." And it hurt so damn much to say those words, because she wanted him to want her, though she knew that her words didn't quite fit that context. But she was certain that Neji understood the hidden meaning behind her pitiful words.

"No, I didn't mean it that way," Neji corrected hastily, and Tenten might have once found his discomfort amusing, if she hadn't known that he was just trying to keep from hurting her any more. Because she was a friend to him. A _friend_.

"Oh," she said simply, dejectedly. Her vision blurred, and she blinked stubbornly.

"I want you to come, Tenten." She couldn't say no to him.

"I'll come," she whispered brokenly, swallowing back the painful lump in her throat.

She felt Neji's warm hand slip into her smaller, though equally calloused, one, and her eyes immediately darted down to confirm that she was hallucinating, because why else would she be imagining the feel of Neji's hand in hers? But when she did indeed see that she was awake, and what was happening was real, her gaze switched to Neji's face, her eyes wide in confusion.

A small squeeze and then honestly, since she could see it in his eyes (she could read them so well), Neji said, "I'm sorry."

And Tenten's mind raced back to three weeks earlier, at the edge of the very same pond, where she and Neji stood side by side in a comfortable silence.

* * *

_Tenten's heavy breaths were in time with Neji's and she leaned against a tree in exhaustion. When Neji had knocked on her door at nine in the evening to ask for a spar, Tenten had been genuinely surprised (they had already had their routine training session earlier that morning), but she couldn't refuse. Hyuuga Neji was asking for her company, even if it was only for training, and Tenten was not about to refuse._

_As usual, their fight had been intense, bodies twisting and turning, and although they were usually a good few feet from each other, there were the brief moments when their arms brushed or Neji's long hair whipped across Tenten's shoulders and face. Her heart had been racing furiously from sheer excitement. It was _thrilling_, sparring with Neji; it filled her with so much joy and energy when she could stand her own against his relentless advances, because she knew that he saw her as a true ninja, and that acceptance was _once_ all that she needed._

_But now, acceptance alone didn't fill her heart completely, didn't pacify her hunger for _something more_. And as Tenten stood shoulder to shoulder with the Hyuuga prodigy, she had never been more certain of what she wanted. _

_It was one of those rare lapses in the usual fast pace of time that Tenten found her heart speed up, and she glanced sideways at the man next to her, who's eyes were aimed up at the starry sky peeking through the dark branches overhead. His face was blank, like it had been carved from the finest marble, without a blemish or impurity. _

_Undeniably gorgeous, Neji was; dark hair perfectly untangled, physically fit (and naively cute when he took his shirt off in front of Tenten after particularly grueling matches), deep silky voice, the list went on and on in Tenten's head. _

"_Tenten," Neji said, and Tenten jumped because she hadn't realized that she had been staring blatantly at him, and she was afraid that he had noticed. She would have to say something sometime, though._

_Neji turned his head to her, and Tenten took a deep breath._

"_I have to tell you something," they chorused at the same time._

_Neji raised an eyebrow and Tenten crinkled hers._

"_You first," they chanted, voices blending together, in a way adding depth to the silence._

_Neji faltered and looked at the ground, and Tenten decided to take her chance, because it wasn't often the he gave her the opportunity to cut him off._

"_I think I love you."_

"_I'm engaged."_

_Neji's eyes immediately darted to Tenten's face, surprise etched in his features, and he opened his mouth as if to speak, but no sound came out. Tenten stood stunned. It felt like a cold wave was washing over her, and all she could do was stand rigid as Neji's words rang throughout her ears. Was it possible?_

"_You're…engaged?" she managed to ask in complete shock, and the awkward silence that followed confirmed her fears. She raised her eyebrows slightly, staring into his eyes, silently pleading with him to tell her that it was a bad joke._

_Neji closed his mouth and frowned, nodding his head silently in response to Tenten's question. Tenten took a shaky step back, all the while keeping eye contact as she shook her head back and forth slowly, her eyebrows furrowed in an expression of utmost confusion. She took another step back, and Neji reached out in one fluid motion to grab her wrist and keep her from retreating further. _

"_Tenten, I…"_

"_Who is it?" Tenten asked quietly, not even attempting to fight against Neji's grip. Neji looked away, and mumbled something under his breath, and Tenten knew something was very wrong because Neji was the Hyuuga prodigy and he didn't mumble._

"_Who, Neji?" Tenten asked again, her voice strained._

"…_Hinata."_

_Tenten gasped and stifled a sob by pressing her free palm over her mouth. It was wrong, so so so wrong. Why, why had everything suddenly just fallen apart in a matter of minutes? Why did her confession have to be buried by the bombshell that was released at the same time she exposed her heart fully? Why did it have to hurt so _much? _She bit her bottom lip to try to give herself another pain to focus on, anything was better than the ache in her chest. She pulled her arm back feebly, but Neji wouldn't let go._

"_The clan…they decided on it…I have no choice," he rambled, staring intently at something to Tenten's left, and voice desperate for reasons Tenten couldn't guess._

_His excuses fell on deaf ears, for Tenten choked out a "Congratulations," as the first warm tear trickled down her face, completely out of place next to the wide smile her mouth had formed (though it was an obvious fake). Neji glanced back at her, and when he saw that she was crying, he dropped her arm out of shock. It was so unlike her to show weakness…_

_Tenten's arm fell limply to her side, and the simple action of letting go, letting _her_ go, broke through the dam she had been trying to keep strong, and the river started down her moon-kissed cheeks, illuminated in the darkness. Neji noticed his mistake, and tripped over an apology, but Tenten shook her head to tell him to stop._

"_Don't," she said thickly, wiping away the silver tear tracks with the back of her hand. "Just…pretend…pretend I didn't say anything." And with another painfully forced smile, she added, "I'm…happy for you," but the tears leaked through her closed eyelids, and before she could break down anymore, she turned to walk away. But Neji grabbed her wrist again, and Tenten let out a shuddering breath. Why couldn't he understand that every time he spoke to her, _touched_ her, he was just making it harder for her to leave?_

"_I'm sorry."_

_Tenten pulled her hand away and kept her back to Neji as she said, "Let's pretend this conversation didn't ever happen." Because it was the best way, she decided. If he would pretend that he didn't know she was painfully in love with him, and she would pretend to be blissfully surprised when the engagement was publicized, it would all be for the better. Things could go on…like normal._

_Whatever normal was. Tenten just didn't know anymore._

_Tenten walked away without a backward glance._

* * *

Tenten didn't pull her hand away, as she was sure Neji expected, but simply said, "There's no point in being sorry. It's decided; nothing can be done. It's fate…right?" she asked with a small smile which wasn't as forced as before, since she no longer hid the sadness behind the normally happy gesture.

"Fate…I don't know if I believe in it anymore."

"What do you mean?" Tenten asked in puzzlement. Neji had always believed in fate. The word itself made her think of him.

Neji looked into her eyes for a moment before glancing up at the stars. "If this is fate…it doesn't feel…right," he struggled slightly with his words, eyebrows creasing as he searched for the right ones. "If this is fate, then it's proven itself to be a cruel thing," he finished finally. Tenten realized that he must have been trying to sympathize with her.

"But, it must all be for the best." She sounded unsure despite herself, and when Neji squeezed her hand again, the small comforting gesture just made her even more unsure, because she still wanted him so much, and now she would never get him. Truthfully, it didn't feel like it was for the best at all.

"You sound like you don't care anymore."

Tenten took a calming breath to organize her thoughts. "I care…too much I think, about this, because it hurts…so bad," she clutched the front of her shirt with her free hand, and lowered her chin to rest on her knuckles. "But…I've realized that no matter how much I…love you," she peeked up at Neji to see his reaction, but he just looked at her with his usual stoic gaze, "we weren't meant to be. You're a prodigy, you're Neji. Your name carries so much weight, so much reverence, and I'm just Tenten. I'm an orphan, I don't have a last name, I don't have anything."

"That's not true, Tenten," Neji said firmly, but Tenten gave him another cheerless smile.

"Isn't it? It's okay, I've accepted-" she stopped abruptly, because Neji had raised his other hand to cup the back of her head, and he moved so that he was standing directly in front of her. Tenten, caught off guard, stammered a confused, "N-Neji! Wh-"

But Neji didn't give her the opportunity to think of a full, coherent sentence to stumble over, because her cut her off by sharply saying, "Tenten." She only had a second to try to interpret the fierce look he was giving her, before he leaned down and crashed his mouth onto hers.

A chill ran down her spine as she stood rigid, and when she didn't push him away, Neji continued. He pulled her hair out of its ties and tangled his fingers into the locks, all the while his mouth working against hers, teeth, tongue, and all. Tenten lost herself; she didn't know what was happening, it was all too sudden, so she didn't bother to try to figure it out. She kissed him back, squeezing his hand tightly and grasping at the front of his shirt with her other hand. Because in that moment of time, rules and fate and the need to decide between right and wrong were not present and did not matter.

Neji pulled her close and kissed her fiercely, with as much passion as he put into their spars. And amid the blurry thoughts that ran sluggishly through her head, something clicked, and Tenten thought she might understand Neji's true reasons behind coming to talk to her that night. If he had just wanted her R.S.V.P., he would have left her with her broken heart long ago. But he was still there, closer than he had ever been, with her or with anyone, and Tenten thought that maybe, just maybe, she understood.

When Neji pulled away, Tenten felt time crash to a halt, and as the whispers of his slightly irregular breathing left her face, she opened her eyes slowly, at first content to only stare at him in silence. And so they stood, hands still clasped, and for the first time in too long Tenten saw sadness in Neji's pale eyes.

"Why?" she asked once the ability to speak came back to her. She had a guess, a hope, as to why Neji had done what he had just done, but she needed to hear the truth from his own mouth.

"Because, I needed to show you that you had something," Neji answered, and Tenten almost missed the next words that he muttered quickly, awkward when it came to his own feelings. "My heart."

Tenten's lower lip trembled and before she even knew what had gotten into her, she let out a laugh. "Neji, how could to say something so cheesy?" And then she felt a hot tear escape each eye, and then two more, and then her laughter died away, only to be replaced by silent tears. "Why didn't you ever tell me?" she asked.

"I knew that it wouldn't work. I knew that this day would come, when I would have to marry inside the clan. I didn't want to start anything that would have to be abandoned in the end…"

"But then why did you just kiss me?! That contradicts everything you just said!" Tenten exclaimed, and she wondered if Neji even knew how his decision to kiss her was even affecting her.

"I wanted…" Neji faltered, and he closed his eyes. When he reopened them he said, "I wanted to get the chance to see what I would be missing for the rest of my life."

Tenten shook her head and said desperately, "But wouldn't it have just been better not to do that?"

"I don't know," Neji said simply. "I can't take it back now, I don't want to."

"But that doesn't change anything, because you're going to leave now, and we'll pretend that this meeting never happened, because we're teammates and we know that we aren't supposed to let emotions meddle in what's supposed to be 'strictly business,'" Tenten finished for him, and Neji nodded and loosened his grip on her hand. "You should probably go," she told him, voice colder than she intended, even though every fiber of her being wanted the opposite.

Tenten let her hand fall from his and tried to ignore the painful lurch of her heart as he took a step back from her. "I'll see you… at the wedding," he said before fixing her with one more look that said all that he couldn't bring himself to say out loud, the first and foremost being, 'I'm sorry that it has to end this way.' Then he turned and began to walk away, leaving Tenten more alone that ever.

"Goodbye, Neji," she whispered at his back, but her voice was lost in the breeze, and all too soon she was left with only the sound of the tree leaves rustling together in the silvery light, the only other voice apart from hers in the lonely forest.

* * *

**A/N:** Hope you liked it. The last part will come whenever i have time to sit down and type it. Please review!


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N:** Well, that only took about a month to finish... thanks for your patience, i've decided that i'm very bad at regular updates... I have to admit, i struggled more with this chapter, as you might be able to notice, but i hope it's enjoyable all the same. Just a warning, there is a reason i classified this as **angst** before romance, but i'm not going to give anything away, so i just don't want to hear whining about the ending. I finished this up while listening to 'The Original Numb Piano' by ModistOne (vids on youtube). It's beautiful.

I'm going to be a cheater and call this my first completed multi-chap fic, even though it's only a two-shot (which was done in way more than two sittings).

* * *

**Unattainable**

The sky was gray, not from impending rain, but because of the thin clouds that dusted over the horizon in the hours before nightfall. A crisp breeze swept through the town and past the window that Tenten was standing at, elbows resting on the whitewashed wooden windowsill. Her chin was resting in her palms, her brown eyes upturned towards the top of the towering trees; their bright green leaves made an unnatural contrast to the gloomy shade of sky they bordered.

The atmosphere was melancholy: all sounds, the leaves, the wind, the few people scattered throughout the town below, every noise blended into an empty drone. White noise, almost. The air was cold, very cold, but Tenten ignored it. Pretended she didn't feel it whipping around her arms and turning her fingertips an icy purple.

She could hear the faint pitter-patter of water droplets behind her, where Neji was in the bathroom taking a shower. (She made her thoughts stop there, because really, wasn't that one dead leaf so very interesting to look at and think about?)

…It was hard, pretending not to feel.

She thought she was getting better, though. At least, that's what she told herself.

She shivered (but really, she didn't, because she _couldn't _feel the cold), and angry goose bumps erupted on her arms (what goose bumps?), and the shower turned off with the sound of old plumbing. A few empty, long, long minutes later, and the bathroom door opened with a creak.

"Your turn," came his voice after a pause, and Tenten was sure that she had felt his eyes on her back. Scrutinizing her, most likely.

"Alright," she answered softly, and took a moment to wonder if her voice had gotten carried away by the wind. What a strange thought…for the wind to just pick something up, and make it disappear. Maybe it could take away time, or turn it back. But then again, such a crazy thing couldn't happen. The past was concrete, and in a sense, so was the future.

"Tenten?" came his voice again, this time questioning, and did she detect a hint of worry? Who knew? She wouldn't overanalyze it, wishful thinking just lead to heartbreak. Or, now that she thought about it, it would just lead to…nothing; the heartbreak had already happened.

She turned around and met his eyes, her own creasing as she sent him a small (fake) smile. She had decided fake was good, since real was too much to bear.

"Neji," she stated simply, feeling an unexplainable urge to answer him in the simplest way possible.

She walked past him quickly, keeping her smile fixed until she was alone in the small, partially steamy bathroom. Her lips fell and she rubbed her arms, shivering.

She was cold. She couldn't deny the fact that her goose bumps were telling her.

She leaned over and turned the knob, and hot water pelted out of the shower head, slowly filling the room with a swirling steam. Tenten glanced at her reflection in the mirror before the glass was completely fogged over.

Brown hair, plain, in two buns (Where was the shine?). Nose, boring, nothing special (Couldn't it at least look a _bit_ like a button?). Lips, too thin, in a strict line (Who would want to kiss those?). Eyes, an empty brown, bottomless and emotionless (Mud. A puddle of mud). That was how she saw herself; if anyone asked her to describe Tenten, she would say those things without hesitation.

She let her hair down, and the brown locks fell unruly around her face and across her shoulders. She twirled a strand around her finger idly, regarding herself in the mirror without expression. Soon, the steam completely covered the mirror, and her reflection faded, slowly, slowly until she disappeared from her own sight. (Goodbye…).

Shrugging off her clothing, Tenten stepped under the searing hot droplets of water, relishing the feeling of their fiery heat spreading through her numb fingers and arms. Her eyes closed drowsily, and her head tipped back until the water ran over the contour of her face, burning and yet not at the same time (It hurt so _good_).

In the stifling heat; in the musical sound of water slapping against her body and the tiled ground, Tenten let herself remember.

* * *

_It had rained on the day of the wedding. From where she was sitting in a front row seat in one of the rooms of the Hyuuga compound, Tenten could faintly hear the cascading sheets of water bombarding the walls and ceiling, though the sound was masked by the excited chattering that was trying to fill her ears instead._

_Everywhere she looked men and women and children in suits and dresses were laughing, smiling, being happy. She felt so out of place, like a single rain cloud in an expanse of nothing but the brightest blue._

_She looked up at the altar in front of her, and wasn't surprised to meet Neji's eyes. His face bore a frown of uncertainty, and Tenten's heart gave a feeble lurch at the sight of him. Unspoken words passed between them: more apologies and more wishes and most of all regrets. Regrets of what maybe could have been, and yet surely couldn't. What-ifs. (And maybe some why-nots?). _

_He was the first to look away, and Tenten couldn't help but feel a little more lost when she found herself staring at the side of his head. She needed those eyes, those cold, empty eyes that only she could decipher emotions from because they were anything but cold and empty to her. _

_A nudge to her side caught Tenten's attention, and she turned to her right, reluctantly taking her eyes off of Neji. She was met with a head of shocking pink hair and emerald eyes full of worry. The color seemed too out of place._

"_Tenten…are you alright?" came the hesitant question, the speaker faltering uncertainly due to the awkwardness._

"_I-I'm fine, Sakura," Tenten said with a smile, but the pinkette still looked troubled, and her eyes shifted to Tenten's lap. Tenten looked down and saw that she was twisting her hands together, holding on so tightly that her fingers were beginning to lose some of their color. She hadn't even noticed. _

"_I-"_

"_Tenten," Sakura cut in, pulling Tenten's hands apart and giving one of them a gentle squeeze, "I know…that this is hurting you. I know… what it feels like losing someone…you love. I'm…I'm sorry." _

_Tenten's eyes widened in shock at the unconventional display of caring and comfort that Sakura was giving her. Sakura, perhaps one of the people she knew the least. Sakura, the pink-haired medic-nin who always seemed to be so happy and _alive_. But now, as Sakura looked into Tenten's eyes, Tenten saw so many similarities between them._

_Behind the emerald lay a hidden sorrow, and perhaps regret. It was something Tenten could distinguish right away, though she didn't know how, and she wondered if people who looked into her own eyes saw the same void, or if they just saw a muddy pond._

"_Sakura-"_

_Before she could finish, soft music began playing, and the guests went silent. Sakura withdrew her hand and turned to the front, leaving a confused Tenten to follow suit, her gaze once more fixing on Neji, though he was staring intently past the crowd of seated guests. _

_Before Tenten knew what was happening, Hinata had already been guided to the altar. Her vivid white dress provided a sharp contrast to her midnight hair, which cascaded over her shoulders as she kept her head lowered. She looked beautiful, Tenten noted a little reluctantly. _

_But what disturbed her the most; what tore her up inside was how eerily similar the man and woman standing before each other looked. Their long hair and pale skin, elegant features and ivory eyes, they were _family_. _

_The priest spoke, and Hinata raised her head to face her cousin. Her pale eyes glanced towards the crowd for a brief moment, and the despair written in her face was obvious. Tenten wondered momentarily what she was looking at, and then silently laughed at her own stupidity._

_Of course, she thought wryly. Of course, Hinata was looking at Naruto with the same pitifully sad expression that Tenten wore while gazing wistfully at Neji. They were so different, a Hyuuga heiress and an orphan, and yet the twisted entity called fate had thrown them into, while looking over minor differences, the exact same predicament._

_They wanted what they could never have, and they had what they had never wanted. It was twisted and cruel and just plain overwhelming, the way they really could not control the paths they ended up taking. They were ninja, they were leaders, they were powerful and almighty and supreme, and yet they were merely petty pawns in the malicious game called 'life'._

_Hinata's eyes swept down the row to rest on Tenten's, and for perhaps the longest two seconds of her life, Tenten felt the burden of someone else's sorrows suffocate her. _

_Those eyes, so similar to Neji's and yet so unimaginably different, spoke the loudest words that Tenten had ever heard. _If I could change this, if I could trade places with you and make it all right and perfect and give us all our happy ending, I would.

_That was the boldest statement Tenten had ever heard the timid Hyuuga speak, and the fact that it was spoken silently did not lessen the impact. _

"_Hyuuga-sama? Hyuuga Hinata?"_

_The girl turned her head away, face set and determined to make her clan proud. _

"_I do," she declared without a stutter, and her voice seemed to fill the room from wall to wall. And then, all too soon, Neji's echoing declaration filled Tenten's ears, and she knew that all was lost. _

_Happy cheers erupted, and smiles broke out on many faces, and Tenten let herself slip away under the cover of excited guests. Once she stepped into the rain, she let the tears flow, camouflaged from all, as she stumbled blindly through the town, ending up on a stone bench drenched in water. _

_She couldn't remember how long she had been sitting, staring unseeingly at her knees, before someone joined her, covering her head with an umbrella and wrapping a firm arm around her shaking shoulders. A quick glance to the right confirmed that the pink haired medic-nin was her visitor, and for the first time in her life, Tenten found herself desperately clinging onto someone as the thundering rain drowned out her cries. _

* * *

Tenten turned the water up hotter, trying to delay the inevitable return she would have to make into the bedroom. It was ironic, really, the situation they were in. A mere month after the wedding, and Tenten found herself on an information gathering mission with Neji. Alone. Fate worked in cruel ways.

Finally giving up on the water (no matter how hot she turned it, it always seemed to end up too cold), Tenten turned off the shower and wrapped a thin towel around herself, stepping onto the cheap white bathroom rug. As she was brushing her teeth, she noticed the folded clothes on the far edge of the counter. She realized Neji must have put them there for her earlier.

She squeezed as much water out of her hair as she could after slipping into her soft pajamas, and when she was content with herself she opened the bathroom door.

She took an unsure step into the room, and a floorboard creaked beneath her bare feet.

"Tenten, come to bed."

Such a request would have normally left her flabbergasted, but under such circumstances she was not, since there was only one bed in the small hotel room. Neji was already on the far side, the white covers pulled halfway up his chest, his head resting on his hands as he stared up at the ceiling.

"It's not that late," she tried, but a glance at the now-closed window revealed a charcoal slate of sky, punctuated irregularly with silver stars.

"We need to get up early tomorrow. The Hokage would like us back as soon as possible, as I'm sure you remember."

She couldn't successfully argue with the truth that came from his mouth, as unenthusiastically and impassively as possible, but she still uttered a lame, "But my hair's wet."

The moment that Neji tilted his head to her, she felt like a complete idiot under the scrutiny of his pale gaze. She hoped that her cheeks weren't flushing, but as she fidgeted with the hem of her shirt, she doubted that she was fighting a winning match.

A sigh escaped Neji's lips. "Just come to bed."

And she was defeated, because how could she ever say no to him? Sometimes she hated that he _knew_ her one true weakness…was him.

"Okay."

She dropped her head as she lifted the sheets back, trying as hard as she could to avoid looking at his (deliciously) bare chest (was he _trying_ to torment her?) as she slipped under them carefully. She turned her back to Neji and scooted as close to the edge as possible without falling off, hating the discomfort she now felt around him.

She missed the old days.

His eyes bore into her back, she felt the scalding gaze clearly, and hoped that he wasn't in any way hurt by her actions. (She then realized how stupid she was, acting like such a timid creature, it wasn't like he would _do_ anything to her).

"Goodnight, Neji," she said to the far wall, hoping that he would accept her soft-spoken apology. The mattress shifted and the blankets were pulled up next to her.

"Goodnight, Tenten."

She bit her bottom lip. Before she fell asleep, she vaguely wondered if one day she would have permanent teeth marks there. She also vaguely realized how ironic it was that no matter how much she tried to distance herself from Neji, they always seem to be pulled closer together.

Yes Neji, fate is cruel, she agreed with him now.

* * *

The first thing Tenten thought when her eyelids fluttered open was 'Oh the irony!'

Even though they had fallen asleep on opposite ends of the bed, they had somehow managed to end up in each other's arms. Tenten's thoughts were hazy with sleep, and she snuggled her face into the warm skin in front of her, breathing in the oh so Neji-like scent of pine and some unknown spice. Their feet were tangled under the blankets, and Tenten was acutely aware of the strong arms holding her close in an almost protective manner.

She blamed the still sluggish way her brain was working for not abruptly pulling away. It was so comfortable, she didn't want to leave. She lifted her head slightly to look at Neji's sleeping face, and her stirring woke him up.

"Good morning," she greeted in a groggy voice as the silvery orbs opened, and slowly, slowly, a minute smile graced Neji's lips, matching hers. It sent butterflies to her stomach.

"Good morning."

Tenten extracted an arm, and after placing it under her ear, she gazed at Neji's face for a (rarely) comfortable silence. His face fell back into its collected expression, though she saw that his eyes were not hard as he stared back at her.

Finally, Tenten said, "You're warm."

And something changed in Neji's expression, and suddenly he leaned forward and captured Tenten's lips in a soft, sweet kiss.

Her eyes slipped closed, and a hand found its way into his impossibly soft hair, which she grasped as she focused on the warmth bubbling up into her heart. A warm hand cupped her cheek, and she tipped her head back a little as she felt the mattress dip slightly and Neji lean over her, keeping his hand in place on her face, gently encouraging her not to run away.

So she didn't.

It was a melancholy thing, the kiss. It was tender so that that small, flimsy thread of something-too-fragile between them wouldn't shatter, and yet just strong enough to assert that there was still _something_ there, something that couldn't possibly be forgotten or buried or destroyed. Neji and Tenten _did_ sound better than Neji and Hinata.

Hinata…

Tenten's previously blank mind began revving up, the gears churning painfully slow, almost as if her brain didn't want to have to think about what it was making her do. Because then she would have to think about how wrong this was.

She was kissing Neji. Neji was kissing her. Neji, who was married, who was out of bounds…

"Oh god," Tenten said, pushing on Neji's bare shoulders, effectively breaking the kiss. She missed the pressure right away…

"What?" came the slightly husky question.

Tenten groaned. "Neji, we can't. We just can't," she said in a helpless voice, rubbing her palm over her forehead. Neji's built form stayed hovering over her, however, and she knew she had to be careful; she was treading in dangerous waters.

"No one has to know."

"It's not that easy," she answered shortly, avoiding his (beautiful, mystifying, entrancing) eyes, giving the answer she was supposed to give.

"Why not?"

She almost laughed at the simplicity of the question coming from him. Still looking away, she said, "Don't be stupid," but the words came out far less convincing than she hoped. They sounded more like a plea, a plea for him to not make her explain any more than she had to.

"That's not an answer."

She exhaled sharply, refusing to play his little game. She knew him too well to miss his sneaky efforts to make her look at him with a snappy retort. She wouldn't look, looking was bad, looking meant that she would lose and he would win (Wait, was that a bad thing? Of course it was, she scolded herself immediately). He would win with those damned eyes that were just too perfect for his own good, because he knew exactly that they could easily be the end of her.

"You don't understand," she mumbled, and mustering all the inner strength she had, she pushed him off of her and rolled out of bed. "We should go soon," were her final words before she locked herself in the bathroom, rubbing her arms against the morning chill filling the bare, white walls.

* * *

The sun had prevailed over the gloomy clouds and was showering the grassy field in warm, yellow light. It was around midday, just a little after. A refreshing breeze blew through the clearing, picking up dry leaves in an entrancing dance. The air smelled crisp and clean. The day was too tantalizingly beautiful; it was mocking them, spitting in their faces.

She lay propped up in his arms, her head lolled onto his chest, a single arrow embedded in her abdomen. Her white shirt was slowly being taken over by a sluggishly seeping red (It looked like a flower blooming out of someone withering away).

Her lips parted and she took a shuddering breath, attempting to form words out of her dizzy thoughts. "S…so…sorry."

Her voice was barely above a whisper, with no force behind it, gravelly and faded in her throat.

"Don't! Don't say that!" he spat harshly, pale eyes on fire as he held her close. She could barely feel the warmth of his body and the thudding of his heart.

She knew that his anger wasn't aimed at her, though she supposed that it should have been. It was her fault for being distracted, for not paying attention, for being stupid enough to let her thoughts wander and leave her open for an ambush.

"Are…they gone?"

"They're dead, but that doesn't matter! Tenten, you're going to be fine, I promise."

She turned her head, a (real, genuine, sincere) tired smile quirking the very corners of her lips. She raised a cold hand to his face and whispered brokenly, "Don't make empty promises Neji, that's unlike you."

The effort of stringing together such a long sentence got the best of her, and her hand began to fall as a fit of coughs erupted from deep in her chest. Neji caught her wrist in one swift motion, placing her palm back against his face, flattening his hand on top of hers to keep it in place.

"Don't go." His voice cracked and he bowed his head. "Don't go…"

"It's going to be…okay," Tenten struggled to whisper, pausing to take a painful sounding breath and wincing as her stomach expanded against the invading weapon. She knew it would only hurt more to yank it out, and she would only die of blood-loss quicker. This was the downfall of having no medic-nin nearby to help. (There was no way out, no 'get out of jail free' card this time).

"It'll be-" another violent round of coughing cut her off, this time accompanied by bitter, metallic blood filling her mouth, which she spat unceremoniously onto Neji's shirt. It was something to remember her by…

"Tenten! _Tenten!_"

Tenten cracked her fading eyes open and took a raspy breath. "Can I have…one last…kiss?"

"What do you mean 'one last kiss'?! You are_ not_ going _anywhere_," Neji declared, but she saw in his eyes that he didn't believe his own words. He wiped the blood tricking down the side of her chin, looking more lost and panicked than she had ever seen him before.

"Don't lie."

"Don't go."

Tenten's eyes slipped closed again.

"Don't go. Don't go. Please Tenten, please, I'm begging you. Don't go."

Tenten's eyebrows furrowed ever so slightly when she felt a warm liquid dribble across her pinky finger and travel down her wrist.

"Neji…don't cry…over me. Please don't," she begged, her voice suddenly quivering emotionally as a burning lump lodged its way into the top of her throat.

"Then don't go," he demanded selfishly.

When she opened her eyes, his face was slightly blurry, so she blinked a few times to get him into focus. Silent tears of sorrow made elegant tracks down his stoic features, if anything, only adding to his beauty. She wiped them away gently, but more came to make up for those that were gone.

"Please…stop," she begged again, the corners of her eyes pricking against the dam she was struggling to hold in place. (No more crying, she told herself. She had done more than enough. No. More.). A half-hearted cough escaped her lips and her head was becoming much too heavy.

"Tenten-"

"Goodbye, Neji…" her eyes closed for the final time, welcoming the drowning sleep slowly overtaking every inch of her worn, damaged body. Even the pain was only a mere echo of what it had been before.

"No! Don't go!" she heard Neji shout from somewhere far, far away, far beyond the darkness surrounding her.

With the last ounce of strength she had, and the last lungful of air she took in, she whispered, "I love you." _'I'll miss you.'_

Warm lips pressed against hers, and she was barely aware of the hand leaving hers, letting hers fall to the ground in a painless thump.

Neji pulled back slowly, leaving fresh tears that did not belong on her delicate face. He wiped them away with his thumb and carefully drew her body closer so that he would not push the arrow in any farther.

"I love you," he said into her hair, over and over to make up for all the times he should have said those words before, but never had. The tears flowed unrestrained, his sadness open to the world to see.

But it was too late.

She was already gone.

* * *

So many ugly gray page-breaks! Ffn needs something less...ugly.

**A/N:** I warned you! You can't say that i didn't. Please review, i absolutely ADORED all of your feedback and ideas from last chapter, you guys are wonderful. Next time i write NejiTen, i'll try to make it a more up-beat one. Promise.


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